1- Caps comments
I swear that these people have nothing better to do.
Examples:
"RUBBER DUCKY BABY BUMPERS" -doberman7 (This was actually funny)
"YOU LOOK LIKE A RAPIST" -JPG-9000

2- Was Here comments
Alright, you were here, so what?
Examples:
"darknessdweller wuz here" -darknessdweller
"Truth was here" -Truth

3- Trolling comments (These are pretty similar to caps comments, but is much
worse than them.)
Sir, you fail.
Examples:
"HEY BITCH WANNA COME SUCK MY COCK" -kingofsansiro
"FUCK YOU BITCH" -betty

4- Spam comments
SpamSpamSoWhat?
Examples:
"ShitFuckRapeCrashShitFuckRapeCrash...
" -Tea

5- Fanboy comments (These ones actually appear in BBS)
Stop being a bitch and arguing over consoles, just play the console you like and shut up. Nice and simple.
Examples:
"Halo r best, MSG r n00b" -Pretty much all the fanboys
"PS3 IZ FO N00BZ BECUZ IT DOSENT HAEV ANI GAMEZ!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!! WII IZ DA BEST" -Wii fanboys (Thanks to ShadowWest2k7 for making this one up!)

6- Stupid Mod comments
Like everbody says, some mods can just lock some of the threads before even reading them!
(This one also belongs to BBS)
Examples:
"No random this or that threads please. *lock*" -Jercurpac, in Ada or Ashley thread

7- Capitilizer comments
These people just capitilize each word for some stupid reason.
Examples:
"Good Morning" -GOTHCLAWS

8- Randomizer comments
These people always say something random for some reason.
(I don't have examples this time, but i will type them as soon as i find some.)

9- BBS Asshole comments
You know these idiots lurking around BBS.
(On my way to find some examples.)

10- "1st Comment!" comments
This section is for the people who end up in a weird happiness when they write the first comment.
Examples:
"1ST COMMENT Z0MG W00T!" -darknessdweller

11- Lol comments
Some people just write "lol", "lmao" etc in comments and reviews.

That's all for now. I hope this thread made you laugh at some point, and i'm gonna update the list as soon as the time permits. Have a nice day.

Edit: I forgot to say. Not all of these comments are on MY news posts, in fact, most of em are related to other people's blogs.